Surrender

I've never enjoyed the sound of the word surrender. It always felt to me like giving up - well tha's what it means in war. When I studied Eastern religions and yoga I discovered that there was more to it, that there were layers of meaning to surrender. I still didn't care for it too much. It still seemed distasteful, a bitter medicine I wanted to avoid.



I'm finally at the point where I can see surender from a different perspective. I came to apoint this week when I couldn't continue to try to push my life into the neat arrangement I had laid out in my head. I was ready to surrender.



Not give up, or accept with resignation, but surrender. A feeling of relief welled up in me and I wrote this to myself..... I thought it might be helpful to you or someone, if only one so I put it here:



Surrender into something deeper, A vaster version of yourself beyond the box of your delination. Dream a different, bigger dream. Live in trust. Everything that seems to be falling away is leading you back to yourself.



Realize you are being led, stop trying to hold on to what was, it wasn't what you wanted anyway. Live more and more from the unseen. Be gentle with everything.



Stay open . Are you willing to let go of what was to allow more and different to come? Release the tight grasp on how you think it should be to allow what can be. All that's needed is willingness. Don't demand to see, just say yes!



Be gentle, here lies your strength.



Stop trying to force, it's unfolding, look at the beauty of not knowing, at the possibilities inherent in not knowing, how beautiful it is becoming.



The artist enjoys even more what can be then the finished product. This is what leads him to create again and again. The writer repeats what many have said before, yet continues to write. There is always in potential another way to phrase, another creation of beauty to come.



What we hunger for is the participation in the act of creation. As we surrender our limited ideas of what makes our happiness, we make the space for creation to begin.